I will probably will incur a major amount of wrath. But in relation to the Brexit.....and President Obama.....in case we forget that the US is a UNION and if that fractured along state lines, all who like to run their own affairs imagine if one of the states wanted to leave the Union!.....oh yes don't forget they have a Supreme court to which cases can be taken......that is why its called the State of the Union that President gives. Oh yes that Union came after a war. Oh and the President gets a hard time in the Congress and the Senate....some times even over budget issues.........so make of that what you will. I am still not sure yet...We are no longer Imperialist we have a Commonwealth but that could in time crash. 

I sit on the undecided fence.  

Europe or not

So Jeremy Corbyn says stay in.....still not sure, not a UKIP supporter at all.   Ok to a common market and friendly relations but not to letting others decide our laws but there have been some positives on the rights and many in this country have benefited. I am worried for other things....but but but.   The pay for the CEO of BP is over the top - no justification.  I support the junior doctors who deserve better hours and pay......to encourage doctors to stay, staff appropriately.   I stand for the rights of women and beg that the school children stolen across Africa and elsewhere ...... get them back NOW.....I pray for their souls and consider that children should neither be soldiers or nor sexually abused.

MIX AND MATCH

Ok here I  go......a bit of a Sunday rant come interested in things.

Fashion, not sure I like this bizarre 2016 look of the straight off the shoulder dress with straps....on please so NOT smart.    Some people like me don't have shoulders......nor hips and a flat bottom...for that matter so simply does not work.  Liked some of the looks mentioned By Francesca Mullin in The Times magazine 09/04/2016 Shop....p56-57.  Love the black and white large spot dress from Hobbs...jazz up with jackets or cardigan (colour match of clash) and really nice shoes works in my view for business or that special event but you can 'dress' it as a look. I note with interest that some dresses I saved from about 3 years ago are back in style.  I like stripes but not all work, like the Aquascutum and the Iris and Ink......examples but not the price....look around. I also like the dress from Coast with counter-wise stripes.   I hunt around second hand shops, found a similar dress to the Aquascutum one shown in such a shop.....£5.99 and boy does it work....oh and lace is back so out come my lace.....


Now for Mr Cameron, I wonder why do we have Tax Havens? do they work like ISA'a? I have been a tax payer all my life from age 15. If I am lucky to have some spare cash I put them in premium bonds and ISA's.  I have just checked my pension statement prediction ..... I will get my state pension when I am 66 should I live that long given I paid in for it will my relatives get back my contributions....No I don't think so. I have 40 years of full contributions....I have also an occupational pension which I paid 11% of my monthly salary ..... should I live, then my occupational pension will be reduced.....Why?????? I paid for both.   I pay tax on my occupational pension.  I fully understand welfare issues of others BUT I have paid my dues.

European Referendum, when I was young I voted no to joining the European Common Market...what to do now...my gut is to vote Leave but but but....I am not a UKIP type voter.   What I beg is that people VOTE it is so important.....I am thinking it through - example not happy with open borders or so much of our cash going into an unaccountable organisation.......however would like to see the sharing of information about criminals and terrorists....again who is a terrorist?  

Sad for India again, following a collapse of a flyover last month and last night a Firework display going wrong...after the denial of permission to hold it on safety grounds.....

Me dressed age 15 playing Mrs Serephita Lunn in a Shaw play.

Me last year.

NOT GONE

In case you wonder....I remain on the planet.....enjoying life....more to write later. Hugs world.

What a world........In Britain we are destroying our industry....step in and save Port Talbot....steel works.  We need to be self sufficient.

Nuclear ..... is the way to destroy all of us.....
We are destroying the planet....does not clash with need to have a viable industry carefully managed.

There is a specter of a Trump president in America....thus pushing us to the precipice.   Add in North Korea....Hell on earth.  

Afraid for my grandchildren.

Here we are in another year, 2016 and I have not put much on here for a while.     Sadly my mother died in February last year.  I do miss her so much.

I have been, as is my want, looking at the current fashions from the catwalk shows and magazine presentations.   Not fussed with the catwalk stuff, I know it is an art form but it is not wearable in many instances.    What appears most horrid are the ultra thin, frail and pale models....you can't really seriously want to look like them.

Before I go on I must say that the red and white check suit with knee length skirt that the Duchess of Cambridge wore the other day was divine...smart, chic, and wearable totally.

Having moved recently I have resorted my own wardrobe to see what I can transform.   it includes everything ....shoes and handbags, T shirts the long type with like a vest, go anywhere under anything.

I like the fact that fashions come round,   Denim does not really go out of fashion...so I can do it this year.  Bringing out my wide leg trousers.


For the young (ops very ageist) check out 'Look' page 38 and see the River Island skirt in angular block colour......great for work, wear with the individual colours as shirts of jumpers.  Try Jackets with it....in matching colours could give you so many outfits ideal for work.....oh don't forget second hand shops and of course know your wardrobe so you can make a new look.

My other insight is silver/metallic pleated skirt.   Pastels, florals and lace done them before as well so out the come.   Have found a product that as a hair colour may work for me.....metallic silver.....just wish my hair was white....wish I could add the pastels as well.  Never ever without my simple plain long jersey skirts.


 For a perfume I love wearing coconut (Body shop) as a spray and an oil serum (even on hair for all around awesome perfume) divine.  Also love the smell of lily of the valley....so fresh and light.



A person whose look I really  like....is Cerys Matthews, with her voice .....so individual.  That is the key...be an individual.


Rather like the cover of  Bazaar.....great looking Robin Wright....love the cut of her hair. She looks fab in the Ralph Lauren's blue and white stripe dress..

REALLY NEED TO KEEP MOVING

Firstly....I am back again.

Warning for online shoppers.    I was using a site today and was interested in a dress. I used the zoom in feature and noted that despite the dress being shown on a slim model the seams and darts were so stretched they were nearly spliting.....I did not buy it!!!! because I could not trust a product depicted if the advertisers could not check their web site.....their loss.


My tip is look at the mags and new trends.....then look at your wardrobe.   What can you reuse?....you can always store unwanted stuff.  Look in any and all sales...you may be surprised and find something to team up with an 'already' item that will upgrade to a new trend. Don't forget secondhand shops.....clothes with good lables are a fantastic bet if it fits with your ideas.   Belts and other accesories can be found here.    Also make sure everything works otherwise it is a waste of time.  Always take care of your shoes.....smart shoes work.....no scuffs.


I love lace.....
Where are the various denier colour tights?....I like to match my colours.  I like to tone in top to toe.....I don't do bland....but I am a sensible person.  

Found a lovely perfume 'For her'  by Narciso Rodriques... soft and sexy but way to expensive...as I must say most perfumes are.    We are in a recession, money is tight...the sellers of items must, if they want us through their doors, consider huge price cuts.   Get the markets moving.... 

Advice for The Duchess of Cambridge....do what the doctors tell you....rest.... seek advice from Victoria Beckham, a mother of 4, a designer, in public eye, get her to design your maternity wear..it could be a massive kick start to the business of dressing pregnant women.  To the rest of the planet...leave the girl alone to manage her pregnancy.


The men I like

Daniel Craig
Damien Lewis
Colin Salmon
David Beckham.........these four are eye candy

Neil Oliver
Stephen Fry
David Attenborough
Jeremy Paxmen
Jonathon Miller
Dara Obrain
Julian Cleary
Matt Baker
Adam Henson

Mix all together for my perfect man.....

My views on sex offenders, murderers, honour crime etc etc, child abuse in all its form are well know.   See you soon......x

KEEPING RAPE IN MIND

Link to post in this dated 29/07/2006

This is an intensely personal story.  I was a police officer for 30 years (1979-2009)  I remember it as if it was yesterday.

Why repeat it now?.......well the time is right, on the back of the Jimmy Savile revelations...along with others I want to remind everyone  out there that a victim of sexual abuse may be sitting next to you RIGHT NOW.   It was only in 2000 that I was able to tell my family what had happened to me when I was seventeen and a half.   I was 46 when I told them, I had told my first husband in 1976 (he was a police officer)  and a colleague in 1983 (a female police officer)   -  what happened nothing. I am 57 now....it remains the single thing that framed my life.


The rape, I suffered, destroyed me - left me hating sex, hating myself - I was left feeling filthy,  soiled, ashamed and guilty - yes guilty.....for his crime against me because I knew that most people would not believe me. It was the culture, I had to have provoked it,  I had to have been wearing provocative clothing and of course I asked for it!!!!!   The burden became heavy, I found it hard to sleep and when I did drop off the nightmare was replayed endlessly....even to the present day - It haunts me daily.  I blame myself for not speaking, he could have offended before.


At the time of the attack I was a quiet, naive, immature and I was a VIRGIN.   I had never had a boyfriend, except a sloppy kiss in a coach that was sweaty hands all innocent fumbling..which left me cold.  I wanted a boyfriend, I could admire I had no longing for sex, but for the romance the stories we read, the dream.   When I was 15 I had been involved in a crash, that left my face injured, my teeth broken and the front two lost, to be replaced by porcelain and gold teeth that looked black....I stopped smiling.  I considered myself to be ugly and unattractive.  I was not popular with the boys my crowd new...just a hanger on.  I was beginning to feel like a woman, my periods had arrived and I hated them. I was beginning to spread my wings blooming into womanhood, but I was spotty.  I was a tallish, thinnish creature with a sallow skin. I was invariably dressed in black or dull colours.  My school friends can vouch for all this.  

Let me take you back, to a summer, a summer when I had been in the sixth form for a year.  I was at Southampton Sixth Form College for Girls in Hill Lane I lived about a mile away (I walked) on the other side of the road was the 'Common' a large wooded area that hosted events during the year.

How did I meet this person?...who would take my choices from me and destroy my sexual life in the future.

It was on the Common at a  The Southampton Show, he was with a display of the Army...he was a soldier, a corporal....I was fascinated.....my brother who was with me and 5 years younger wanted to enjoy the boys toys.   

Despite my innocence, I was growing into womanhood, I was curious but  aware of my little deformity so hung my head and hardly smiled.

The corporal on the stand with the equipment was - Irish, with a divine accent....I stared at him under my lashes a shy little girl.  I was entranced,  as he paid attention to me.   We lived nearby and my brother in his innocence...asked him back for tea.  He had a powerful personality, he was nice to my parents and my brother.  My mother was tight lipped.  I was excited when he parked his land rover on our drive.  He was glamorous.  At last I was somebody to someone, I had a crush on an older man with a car and a job.   The two weeks passed in a whirl.    I knew he had served in NI. The events had spun me around. The occasional drinks with his mates, this was not a world I knew their knowing looks went over my head, the head of a child.

All of a sudden he was gone. "see you" were the words.

He had not asked me for sex directly but he had taken me to an army married quarters, home base, residence.  A house, that I would later find was his.    We sat and talked and yes kissed.   Looking back from here he could not risk forcing me to have sex here.   He told me it was the home of a friend and I thought it was true. I was sorry, but I thought it was me, I was back at college after the summer break, working part time, and consoled myself he was probably working as well.


So to the moment fate took a hand in my life,  the day.....a college day, I was to leave late but I was also tired having started my period, from which I suffer pain and mood changes. I wore what were called towels, for my period, a new style that came with pants that had a combe mechanism to hold the towel in place. No Tampax for me, internal protection, they scared me.

I  had been preparing for a forthcoming event.  The evening was wet and cold, the walk whom seemed daunting. I was tired so tried to hurry as I was bleeding heavily as normal and I felt terrible. The path way I was on  was direct to my home with only one turning right, not a single need for me to cross the road (Hill Lane) on the opposite side for the whole length is the Common.   I was used to the road, and not scared.  I was in heavy shoes, thick tights a tweed skirt and a duffel coat and carrying my case, hardly provocative.  I became aware of a vehicle slow driving on the other side....of the road travelling in my direction.   I heard my name called and looked to see that it was him.  He offered me a lift and relieved at not having to walk I crossed over and got in the door opened from inside. I was pleased to see him.

We spoke, hello,  how are you?  I noticed he was not 'friendly'  and that we passed my road, Raymond Road, "how about a drink" I really wanted to go home, I can not recall the exact words.  Something like, "I really must stop" "anyway  I should tell mum"  Was this inbuilt concern from a rebellious teenager?  No mobile phones then! We did not stop or turn round we headed to the traffic lights and turned Left to pass the football ground. Another left passed the cricket ground.  We drove into a narrow road on the the Common. We were in effect driving back to Hill Lane, back on ourselves but I knew that a car could not get through...with a barrier at the end of this road.  The Cemetery was on our right, just past the entrance and church.   It is wooded there with huge trees. There was poor light.

I was concerned, warning bells rang in my head,  suddenly every sense was alert. He smelt of drink, he seemed angry.  Rain drops hit the windscreen. It was as if the car was crying.  The smell of drink now seemed strong as he leaned over me from the driver seat.  He twisted slightly, he was heavy against me, face to face, he pushed his face in mine my mouth and lips were dry, I could barely speak. I felt sick as he tried to force his tongue into my mouth. I did not recognise him, he pushed me and his right hand slipped up my skirt, his right hand on my left knee.  Then between my thighs, separating, dividing my thighs on ward to my pants. He must, I reasoned feel my sanitary pants and the towel. I had never allowed this or indeed had the need to deny such behaviour previously. He didn't stop. He changed position and touched my towel, pressing the virginal area.

I seemed to come to life.  I pushed him away.  I clasped his wrist to and pulled his hand up and out with as much force as I could muster.."No! please don't"  I could not have been more clear. "I have my period" what more could I say? He did not hear or did not want to hear. My heavy blue duffel coat had toggles.  He tried to undo it. His wonderful Irish accent was now harsh and raw.  I can't remember the words.   I called me a tease, a 'prick tease' and accused me of playing a game. But it was I who was the game, I was a bet.  He had bet his colleagues he could have sex with the ugliest woman they came across....grab a 'grimmer'.  I was bought, a bet - I was not important.

The second he lent away - instantly but as if in slow motion I grabbed my bag and ran. I escaped the car.  He followed me, caught me and pulled me into the wood.    He pushed me against the tree, against the trunk. He pinned me to the tree, with his body and pushed me down with his weight.  He forced his tongue into my mouth.  He changed position so that I was leaning half up and half way down by the root.  I was crying, not sobbing but pleading tears.   My period, my period I cried.  I can still feel this and hear myself. Surrounded by trees, in darkness I was frightened for my life.

He used his arm across my chest and held me then reached the top of my pants and with one movement pushed me down, and away from the trunk. With his other hand he in one movement tugged my pants down with his knee hefted my thighs up.   It was so skilled so practised. His hands went in side my thighs lifting my bottom, skirt well up, his hand inside me.  He grunted, and roughly trust his fingers inside me.   All the time he was pressing on my chest, his left arm across me. He was astride me, his penis was thrust harshly inside. His trousers were not down, his penis was through the open zip.  I could smell my blood. A 'Stink' I cannot forget. I was swamped by him, overwhelmed by him.  This could not be what sex was about?   His fingers were also probing, so his hands must have had my blood on them.  It was all force. He fingered my anus.  Don't let anybody tell you that a man needs is trousers round his ankles to commit rape....he does not. 

I felt pain inside, he rammed me. I was jammed by his penis.  I felt he had done it before, it was expertly done, so clinical.

The time disappeared.

He was gone, I took off my tights and pants, replaced my shoes head for home a few yards way, so close but so far. Blood was all down my legs as I crossed Hill Lane, time was standing still.   Once in, shouted to Mum I am going to have a bath   I hid it, I hid the evidence that could have worked in my favour.   My life disintegrated. 

Later in the press I learnt of his arrest and charged with murder, conviction for manslaughter.  His wife and child.........To this I lost my virginity.....who cares?   Do you?

Keeping the work going

Before I go on....I can't spell for toffee....so apologies for past and future errors....I do try honestly and yes I know about spell check!!!!


I am still struggling with my PhD.   So any one out there have infomation on the following;

Sophia/Sofia Croll-Dalgairns
David Croll-Dalgairns
Annie Marie Christine Seager/Waygood/Dalgairns
Frederick August Howard Anderson
Henry Johnson Stanley
Rachel Theodora Chatfield Dalgairns
Ivor Stuart Croll Dalgairns
Theodora Christina Stanley aka Jarvis aka Mallik
Dalgairns of Coupar Angus
Lieutenant Colonel James Dalgairns
Edward Frederick Dixon Seager
Theodora Von Oswald
Theodora Rosina J F Caroline Oswald aka Seager.

My work is important to me, the research is designed to look at the lives of a group of women of whom Sophia/Sofia was the leader.

Someone out there must know one of the names/families above.

I HAVE BEEN - MISSING FROM MY BLOG

Where does the time go....nearly Christmas 2012, the Jubilee and the Olympic have been and gone...Things have made me angry but I have been silent.  

Lets see how we go from here.....

I am still looking for family members of the owmen I am researching....

I am still into fashion....

I have a new job that I love....

Discharged from cancer clinic...so fingers crossed.

See you soon.

CARISBROOK

VINTAGE FASHION ON THE ISLE OF WIGHT.

I am a huge fan of vintage fashion and this is the first of my profiles of such outlets on the Isle of Wight. The first shop is 'So Vintage' in Carisbrook. The window always fascinates, and is changed very regularly. There is significant stock, in fact packed to the rafters. Not only does it sell fashion but accessories. On one visit there was a fab 50's picnic set. There are some issues, the prices are a little high for my taste, will drive away potential purchasers. There is also limited opening but aim for Saturday. This is a family business so more power to them. Does carry the Vintage magazine.

SUNNY AND RAINY

Well at the end of another week on the island and I am fully moved into my office, the final write up of Phd is underway. Cowes week starts on Saturday which should bring some interesting people to the island, not least Zara Philips I hear. Her Mum is coming to open the new RNLI station etc. Perhaps we should be called the Royal Isle of Wight. The history here is fantastic, well worth coming just for that....but then again there are some fab beaches and a real traditional English Holiday atmosphere. Will get properly into this blogging and offer more insights. xx

TALKING ABOUT THE ISLE OF WIGHT

This is my new home, and I am unashamedly in love with it. There is of course always a but.... the people on the island, cant drive...reflected in the accident statistics... the roads are not suitable for 70mph due to the condition of the roads. The idea of not blocking a junction is lost on them which causes the most stupid congestion.... I do actually believe the council are in many ways guilty since they dont up date the juntion markings which have often faded to invisibility. The island is in danger from the cuts as well...they want to close way to many libraries and is currently being challenged in the courts. They also have messed up the schools.

I think this is a great place to shop, but we are reliant on stuff coming across on ferry. This means we are further held hostage to the outrageous cost of travel to the island.

I am delighted that there is a lack of big shopping malls, there is a proper high street culture. There are real green grocers, butchers and fishshops...supreme.

The County Press, is a good paper and informative. What it tells us is that crime is they same every where.

It is an island that has an elderly population, but there is a life for young people if they care to look for it. Move forward.

I shall be writing regularly now.

WHAT A FASHIONISTA SHOULD NOT WEAR

MUCH HAS CHANGED

Mick and I have moved recently. Still studying.

I am going to revamp this blog to focus on fashion in the shops on the Isle of Wight.

See you soon.

IN MY VIEW

Over the last few weeks there have been some extra-ordianary TV programmes about the long battle over 70 years ago, when young men took to the skies in Spitfires and Hurricans to take on Germany's bombers during the Battle of Britain. Maybe we should remember year on year that the reason we can live in (relative freedom) a Britain that should reflect this glory and not embrase petty celebrity culture.

For example George Michael, previously a talented singer, now a simple drug addict and not before time he is weeping in a cell. He has traded on his name and celebrity for far too long. Along with the Pete Docherty's and the Amy Winehouses the idea that money and celebrity exonerates that person from committing crime....wrong, oh so wrong. He is without doubt a wimp and a coward, he should be in solitary with no luxury to learn the value of reflection and how luck has been in life and how stupid he is as a person, arrogant and unthinking. He gave no thought to his partner. I care not a jot about him and hope he rots. He could have so easily killed a child...what would he have done then? Let's consign him to the bin of 'anonimity' and lets see how he likes that. The same of course can be said about Ricky Hatton, I guess he will run for rehab. I understand about depression I have suffered all my life but I have avoided, illegal drugs. I have had treatment and rose slowly from the mire.


A dear old lady died in anonimity this month, Eileen Nearne MBE wartime agent of the SOE strong under torture and silent in her life about her life. How different from the vainity of George who has not the courage to resist addiction. Now she will have the buriel service and recognition, she deserved. People passed her by or made up stories, they failed to consider that the elderly have lived full and interesting lives...and offer much insight into the world, its failings and its glories. I suggest those interested read 'A life in Secret - The story of Vera Atkins and the Lost Agents of the SOE' by Sarah Helm published in 2005.


I would have said much recently about child abuse, child deaths with parents killing themselves and their children. This is my view the most selfish act. I have watched the news with sorrow and the terrible disasters across the world, the floods of magnitude in Pakistan, with the self seeking government leaders looking only to their power. Millions of lives destroyed, the loss of food supply. The poor babies, so ill with diseases in the water that is polluted, the Taliban who are using this tragedy to cause problems while the Army tries it's hardest to save people. So much for politics and religion. Also of course there is the Pope's visit, for Catholics I see it as important, I have watched with interest. The overriding issue for me is the secrecy of the papal records which should be hand in total to criminal investigators. The truth is now out there, a Belgium Arch Bishop has confessed as have others, resulting in no value in secrecy unless there is more guilt and more to cover up.

The question of women being stoned to death or imprisoned because they are educated and covered from head to toe in the shroud that means death in life, should be condemned. I think every woman should stand hand in hand in every street, city, town, village, region, country and continent to say they stand with these poor desperate women victims of monsterous religiously fundemental states. There but for the grace of life go us, each woman could face this future.


I have been horiffied (by way of balance) I also condemn really stupid girls, who without understanding real freedom, behave in such as a way for me to say 'I why do I bother to care when they dont'. I find many women have wasted the opportunites that WW2 was fought for. freedom yes, right to speak ones mind yes, but commonsense, accountability and responsibility an even bigger yes yes yes.


TV REVIEW. I have loved 'Val and Roger are In' excellent acting, beautiful story. The new series of 'Who Do You Think You Are' and Merlin of course. Can't wait for more Dr Who, love Matt Smith. Hope to see Anne Widdicombe win Strictly Come Dancing!!!!!!



THOSE CUTS. Well I think all benefits should be reviewed, the elderly should get preferencial treatment for any money available.

I have been researching the history of female employment, nothing has changed... I do however think that you should take jobs offered even if it is not a job you want (in the 20's and 30's this happened, you lost your benefit if you did not take up work) You build up your CV of course with every job you do. Think adult education, at home, on line to improve your skills. Form family co-operatives in your local environment and share child care. Yes of course you have to be careful, but if it means that one person picks up children from school - do the checks and use your commonsense. Think forward. Education is important, vital, but not everyone can be a university candidate, for goodness sack avoid the media courses, you will only end up watching yourself, there are only so many places in media. You need to be able to READ, WRITE, DO MATHS in addition there should be mechanics, cookery and domestic management for all. Married or single you have to balance your finances.

Avoid all credit cards and loans......cut you consumption to you income. Bin the huge wide screen TV's. This Christmas spend money on making it a family one, with good food instead of over priced presents.


My heart is with Coleen Rooney and her son Kai, If I was her he does not come anywhere near me until he has full checks for all sexually transmitted diseases and never ever trust him again use a condom. His foolish and dishonest behaviour could lead to her having serious health problems in the future. SHAME ON WAYNE ROONEY. Don't think footballers are super dooper guy's to fall for, they are pathetic and stupidly attached to their 'manhood' AVIOD LIKE THE PLAGUE.


RANT OVER. FOR NOW.